All I Want for Christmas

I am one of the lucky ones -- I have so much, and don't want or need much more (until of course I go to Housewerks or a fabric store). But my mom asked me what I wanted for Christmas, so I decided to put together my mostly pie-in-the-sky wish list.

I've wanted one of these pendant lights forever. They are like $900 from Birch and Willow and I'm way too cheap (and now too poor) to pay for it myself. I keep trying to make them with various forms and vines and twigs and it never works. Stupid artisans and their stupid unrippoffable artisanry.

I need the following bike for going to the market, and it needs to be in this color. I can haul around pumpkins, a litter of puppies (kittens are too wiggly) or logs for the fire. I could also haul around a cooler with popsicles and sell them at a steep profit on the National Mall when it is not 28 degrees, as it is today. Clearly it is very useful at $1,500. Madsen bikes.



For shorter trips, a very cool Amish-made scooter, specially painted for Martha lovers. I would buy a jug of Tinkling Springs milk and ride around la la la.

Caramels from Etsy. I think it's a caramel of the month club.

Anything Jo Malone Grapefruit. Very expensive.

This house on the Eastern Shore. Hands off. it's mine. $350k and 50 acres.

That house looks drafty! Therefore I need two of these $500 cashmere throws from Ralph Lauren.

The fields are obviously muddy and full of Canada Goose poop, so I desperately want these Hunter boots in pumpkin but they don't seem to be available anymore. (I ended up buying a pair in red because I need them so bad.)


And because I am poor, I need someone (else) to keep me in truffles. (And champagne, please.)